“Please expand on your WHY…why do you want to make more money and travel?”
This was the feedback given to me on a 60 second clip I had to submit for a panel I was asked to participate in. And my initial reaction was, “Why not?”. I mean, who wouldn’t want to make more money and travel at leisure? But of course there was more to it than that. There always is.
Let me back up a bit to my life before I figured some things out. There you would have found me working a typical corporate job in a windowless office with a commute ridiculous enough to make a preacher cuss. I wasn’t making what I was worth and my annual allotted vacation time was summed up to a whopping two whole weeks. Each passing day I was feeling less connected to the company’s value system and management style, and even though I tried to put on a happy face when I walked in late every morning…it was stamped on my forehead. Something had to give. But for a long time I wasn’t sure or confident in how that should look so I stayed stuck. And here’s the deal, while I am admittedly expensive, money does not impress me. I am not a collector of things (except for shoes) and my old house with creaky floors suits me just fine. So while more money will always be welcomed, it wasn’t the sole motivating factor and neither was travelling more. It was the reality that was hard to admit: I was not living. I was existing. And that was crushing me.
Living. What does that look like exactly? It took me a minute to sort this out but for me it means following through on my purpose. It means dreaming big and fighting like hell to accomplish those dreams. It means seeking out the wonder of every day life. It means leaning into fear and doing it anyway. For me it means taking control of my time and creating my own wealth.
And in order to start living big I had to let go. I let go of thinking I wasn’t enough and that I didn’t have what it was going to take. I let go of what I thought others thought of me. I let go of trying to be perfect and fit someone else’s ideals. I just let all the negative self talk go. So when I was unexpectedly, yet very nicely fired from my corporate job…I graciously let it go and barreled after my next chapter.
Now here I am. Creating and controlling and fearing and leaning. Every day is a roller coaster ride with all the feels and it is everything I never really knew I wanted. Because freedom is the ultimate form of living and it is my passion to be an example of what’s possible. And I’m learning anything is possible…even making more money and travelling. Because, why not?